How do you avoid becoming a target for bullies?

I'm a teenaged boy in high school. I'm always being picked on. I know people may say things like, "Stand up for yourself, ignore them, etc." However, how do you avoid becoming a target to begin with? How do I prevent someone going, "Oh lets mess with this guy."
Answers

Shane

You would be wise to enroll with a Martial Arts program, and begin a serious journey in self defense. I started Jiu jitsu at 14, and earned my first black belt at 18, and pursued my blackbelt in Brazillian Jiujitsu at 20. I gained a 4th degree Brazillian Jiu jitsu blackbelt at age 23, competed actively, and taught a course during college, and today, I enjoy my capabilities, but stay busy in our ranching operation, and my consulting engineer practice. Did I mention, I've never concerned myself with bullies.

rafaiel

From the beginning don't hang out with the "cool" kids. That was my mistake in high school. They aren't cool at all, they are just jerks. For 3 of my years in high school they (usually the soccer team) bullied me and made my life miserable. I hated high school and began to get depressed. My last year i had to get surgery and couldn't play with them anymore. So i found another class instead of soccer. I chose yearbook, and in that class i met the most amazing people. They made me love going to school just because i wanted to see them. My senior year was the best year of my life. So find good friends from the start and don't try to be cool, don't try to be popular because honestly, nobody really cares if you are popular in high school, just enjoy yourself and find the right people.

ashley

Be strong and act strong

Fred

Obviously bullies see something in you that they see is a weakness and this makes them believe it is safe for them to bully you. Bullies get their jollies by seeing you look hurt by their bullying. They can see they control your emotions and this makes them feel superior. The first thing you must do is not look hurt by their bullying so you deny them the joy of controlling your emotions. By not looking hurt they do not get as much joy out of it and may decide you are not as much fun to bully as you used to be. If the bully actually physically attacks you have the right to go to the police and report the incident and hopefully the police will send someone around to chat with the bully. Imagine the scare of the police coming to his house to discuss in front of his parents that he is a bully. He would be sh!tting himself. Remember you owe the bullies nothing so don't keep quiet. Teenagers generally will not tell on their bullies as they are embarrassed to tell adults they are being bullied, and feel ashamed they are being bullied. if you can't get the bullying to stop talk to the school counsellor or the principal and make sure the school knows you are being bullied. They have a duty of care to keep you safe and to provide a happy place for you to learn and are supposed to stop bullying. Some will and some make out it is not the school's problem and will not even talk to the bully. There have been adults who sued their school they used to be bullied at as the school did not stop the bullying they knew was happening. But they have to be told so they have the opportunity to know it is happening and the chance to do something about it before you have any chance of winning a case against them. So make sure they know you are being bullied. You have to make life for bullies uncomfortable or they will keep bullying you. Tell your parents and maybe they will go see the principal and make them do something about it. Another tact is maybe send the bully's parents an anonymous letter saying you are a concerned pupil from the school who hates bullying and their son is a bully who bullies a kid at school. Print it out so no one can see it is from you and don't sign it or say it is from you. Hopefully the parents will discuss the letter with him and make him feel very uncomfortable. Don't admit it came from you if the bully accuses you and make him believe someone else who hates bullies who wrote it as it will drive him mad wondering who this unknown person is picking on him. I saw a thing on the internet where a gay kid was being bullied. One day a notice suddenly appeared on the bully's locker that said something like "to the kid bullying the gay kid. I dare you to touch one hair on his head". Signed the school quarter back with 2 dads. It would have scared the bully as maybe he now risked being beaten up by some one he didn't know. Half the fear is not knowing who is picking on them. Maybe if you can slip a note in his locker saying that "we are a group of students at this school who hates bullies and unless he stops bullying they will start to bully him". If you can convince the bully there are others who don't like what is happening and he doesn't know who they are it will likely make him feel uneasy. But you have to make sure the note cannot be traced back to you and you are not seen putting the note in his locker. I have helped 2 boys who were badly bullied in school by giving them both this advice and it worked well for both. Many bullied boys are not seen as equals and are seen as little kids. I noticed when I went to school the popular boys were relaxed in the change rooms being seen naked. Many teenage boys are scared to be seen naked in the change rooms and more confident boys can see this as weakness and it makes the lesser boy a target for bullies. I told these 2 boys to get naked when ever appropriate such as changing after sport or after swimming. I told them to have a towel and soap and go shower taking their time and show off their body. Most teenage boys like boys who are comfortable being seen naked by other boys. The fact is all normal teenage boys peek while changing at their friends c0cks and n#ts. It is part of being a normal curious teenage guy and yes they all do it and you are not the only one. Boys like the boys who are relaxed about being seen naked. Who would you prefer to be friends with 1) the scared shy kid who does not want others to see their man bits, 2) the relaxed boy who stands confidently naked in the shower and while he changes, who would skinny dip with other boys in a private pool, or camp naked. Nearly all boys would prefer their friend to be relaxed being seen naked as it sends a subliminal message that this boy is fun and more mature and honest than a scared embarrassed kid. It says this is a young man, whereas likely at the moment you are being seen as a little kid and unworthy of being treated as an equal. Believe me this getting naked thing really works and both the boys I told to do this were not keen but finally did it and very quickly all the bullying stopped. Don't let smart mouthed bullies put you off and just keep doing it. The Boys who would not even talk to them before suddenly were treating them as friends. They both said they were very nervous at first but soon found in less than a minute they felt quite comfortable. They both told me it was the best advice they ever got and after years of being bullied suddenly it all just stopped. So man up as likely you have just as good a body and c0ck and n#ts as the other boys so have no reason to be scared or embarrassed. It is time to man up and stand with pride in the change room and ignore any attempt by the bully to put you down. If the other boys see a new you and start being your friend likely the bully will give up as you are no longer the friendless kid that is easy to bully. The choice is yours. You can sit their feeling sorry for yourself and you will be bullied and put down all your teenage life, or you can stand up and show the world that you are a proud young man who is not just going to take sh!t from idiots who think they have the right to destroy you for their enjoyment. Make sure you do the getting naked thing in the change rooms thing as believe me it does work. Boys like the game boy who shows himself off. Keep doing it even if the first time does not turn you into a school hero as I guarantee you there will be boys there who will admire you for being the young man who is relaxed being seen naked by them. I remember one of the 2 boys I helped telling me after the first time he got naked in front of the other boys a boy who had never been friendly invited him to come to his place and get naked with him as he enjoyed getting naked with friends and relaxing, and he admired the boy for being game and relaxed about getting naked in front of other boys. This boy in 12 months was one of the more popular boys at his school and his school grades improved a lot as he was a happy student. Teenage boys enjoy being naked with other teenage boys so if you get the offer go do it as it will all help with your popularity. Boys who are popular with boys tend to be popular with girls. Girls like to be seen hanging out with the popular boys. Both boys had girlfriends before the end of the year as they had become popular with the boys. Do not resort to violence with the bullies as this will cause you more trouble than you need. Win the boys over with being seen as a young sexy man as that will get you a heap more friends than being violent. Good Luck.

Ashleigh

They target you because you look/seem sensitive/timid, so they know they'll get a reaction out of you. All bullying is is an ego boost, and perhaps you exude insecurity which makes them feel better about themselves. If you act as though you are their equal, they will eventually get bored. Don't ignore them, because they will see that you are obviously hurt, but just laugh with them as though you are having playful banter. Even if you are not feeling it, you should walk/talk with confidence and they will begin to see you as an equal rather than an inferior.

Indigo Shojo

Hang out with a group of friends regularly. Bullies prefer to target loners.

Steve

They don’t go, “Oh let’s mess with this guy.” They perceive weakness, and proceed to take advantage of it. Whatever they say is just a reaction to what they’re perceiving. Changing that perception should be your goal. How you do it is up to you.

Anonymous

Take a close look at yourself. What makes you different from any other kid you see in the halls of the school. If you don't see anything obvious, then there is nothing you can do about your appearance. Next, think about how you react. Bullies who are picking people at random will continue picking on someone that they get the desired reaction from. Try to have no reaction at all as though you never heard them. Walk on by. Do not drop your head. Do not look at them. Don't walk faster. Do not give them anything that makes them want to continue to target you. Since fighting in school could cause more trouble for you, I don't recommend actually fighting them. And in a war of words, somehow, the bully usually wins.

Jerry S

start hanging out with friends. bullies like to target people who are alone. Good luck.

Tardi

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elj2017c: Consider the following

Consider the following: ▪ Try to put thoughts of revenge out of your mind. Vengeance often backfires. At any rate, revenge is not really satisfying. Remember the Bible’s wise words: “Return evil for evil to no one.”—Romans 12:17. ▪ When things appear to be getting heated, get away quickly. The Bible says: “Before the quarrel has burst forth, take your leave.” (Proverbs 17:14) In general, try to steer clear of those who tend to bully. Says Proverbs 22:3: “Shrewd is the one that has seen the calamity and proceeds to conceal himself, but the inexperienced have passed along and must suffer the penalty.” ▪ If bullying persists, you may need to speak up for yourself. Choose a moment when you are calm, look the bully in the eye, and speak in a firm, level voice. Tell him that you don’t like what he is doing—that it is not funny and that it hurts. Do not resort to insults or challenges.—Proverbs 15:1. ▪ Talk to a responsible, caring adult about the bullying. Be specific about the problem, and ask for help in handling it. Do the same in your prayers to God, and this can be a wonderful source of help and comfort.—1 Thessalonians 5:17. ▪ Remember that you have value as a person. The bully might want you to think that you don’t matter, that you deserve to be treated badly. But he is not your judge. God is, and he looks for the good in each of us. It is the bully who becomes less worthwhile by resorting to such conduct. There are many more helpful articles on the website below in the Online Library.

Anonymous

time to man bullies are afraid of those that fight back bring a fake gun to school and ensure he sees it on your person, he will not mess with you NRA "fake guns do not kill people"