Why does this older white lady at the gym keep glaring at me and giving me hateful looks?

I am an Asian woman in my 40s. I am in decent shape and I go to the gym 5 days a week, 1-2 hours a day. I dress conservatively. I am athletic( I weight 135 lbs) and I'm in shape but I DON'T wear revealing tight clothes. I wear a T-shirt, a cap, and normal shorts. I have good hygiene and I always wear my long hair in a ponytail. Today I was on the elliptical machine and this older white (maybe 250 lbs) passes by me and shoots me this disgusted hateful look. I ignore it even though it makes me feel bad. She gets on the recumbent bike 3 machines down from me and I notice she is glaring at me and giving me a death stare. I ignore it. 30 minutes later I decide to leave the gym and I am looking down as I walk towards her direction where the stairs are. I feel some intense energy and vibe and I look up and she is staring at me with her eyes furrowed, glaring at me in pure disgust and hate. I immediately look away and walk fast down the stairs. I never interacted with this woman before in my life. Why do you think she gave me such hateful evil looks? Was she a racist? I thought she was which is why she gave me those really bad nasty looks. It makes me feel like something is wrong with me which there isn't and I am bothered by her obvious hate. SOME of you have answered my question but some of you just gave me suggestions on how to be nice to her?! I just wanted to KNOW REASONS, theories or assumptions why she acted like this.A few of you didn't even answer my question and even went as far to question my experience because you doubted it. This is my experience and this obese woman was nasty and stared me down hatefully at the gym. I want answers not negative judgements or doubts of what I saw.


Don't let her bother you. Some people are just angry people.

Big Mama

Do as if she didn't exist, it's just envy. You should feel pity for her.


You should do 2 things - one tell the manager of the store about this woman and how she makes you uncomfortable - She may be doing the same thing to others. AND Next time she does it, then in a Clear Loud Voice so other people can easily hear, confront her by asking her "WHY ARE YOU STARING AT ME, I DONT APPRECIATE IT - STOP IT"


Next time, give her a cheerful "Good morning!" or "Good afternoon!" See how she reacts to that. If she simply ignores you, leave it. Either then or the next time, ask her "Have I done something to annoy you?" If she still ignores you, don t talk to her again - it s her problem, not yours, and there s nothing else you can do.


She sounds like a fat vile witch. I bet she's really jealous cos she knows she'll never look as good as you. You must start seeing her differently. She's fat and revolting and hates her body. Every time she glares at you, give her a smile, that will annoy her more cos you're happy and she's not. Don't ever feel intimidated by her. The more people try to intimidate me, the more I stand up for myself and show them their intimidation won't work with me. If she's racist, that is her personal problem, but don't let it get to you, she's an idiot, that's why she's fat.

heart o' gold

Sounds to me like it’s something going on with her and not with you. If it makes you uncomfortable you may want to address it with the staff at the gym. It’s hard to say what this is, it could be the race thing, a jealousy thing that you are fit and attractive and she is not. It could also be brain malfunction or personality disorder. If it were me, I’d probably share how it makes me feel with a staff member - one I have developed a casual relationship with, I tend to build relationships with people I interact with during my daily routines. I wouldn’t do it in a complaining way, just in a “hey, this makes me uncomfortable and I thought you should be aware of it” way. She may well do that to others as well. Other than that, I would ignore her and try to not let it affect me. And would make sure she never had access to any of my possessions or garments while at the gym.


It doesn't seem like you are doing anything wrong and you seem like a nice person. Maybe just ask her what her problem with you is because that's the only way you'll find out


Go to her and slap her right across the face! No, more seriously why didn't you just simply go to her and ask her? That is really the one and only way to know the truth. All the rest is just assumptions in your head! Next time, go ask her!


I think we've met you before. All that stuff about the 'death stare' is familiar, only it was a different situation. How can you be sure she's really glaring at you, and giving you 'hateful' looks?


Racist by nature The. Most dumb nation of the world


You have to go back.

Steven Stanley

I don't know