I don t know when or how it started but, over the past year or two I ve developed an extreme paranoia towards everyone and everything. I don t know if this was because of some earlier experiences or what. I ll just put this out there, I m 14 years old. My dad s an alcoholic and has beaten & abused me & my mom many times. Most of them because he thought she was cheating on him and I was in on it (She wasn t.), probably on account of his paranoia. It s been a while since then and we ve gotten over it, but I seem to have inherited his extreme paranoia. Not to long ago I started believing someone was watching me. I don t know why but I did. I tried reading up on it a bit but I haven t been able to get a straight answer to what it is I have (if anything). Paranoid Schizophrenia? Plain old Paranoia? Or what?
I ll elaborate a little more on what I mean by watching me at all times .
No, I don t believe someone is plotting to kill me or anything, I simply believe that someone, somewhere, is watching me. I ve thrown all logic out the window at this point. And... sanity as well. This person watching me doesn t interact with me, they re just there. I often imagine where they re watching me from, and I ll even leave vantage points for them to spy on me with. But with this person being around all the time, I can t help but feel shame doing things like getting dressed or using the restroom. I sometimes imagine I m under a microscope. And I m just a test subject of life. What is this?
Judy & Charlie
Your parent or guardian needs to get you to see your family doctor about this.
If they can't or they won't, then you must go to the front office at school and make arrangements to see a school counselor. The counselor is a mental health professional who is held to federal confidentiality and so anything you tell the counselor will be held in private and confidential.
The counselor can get an appointment for you to see other school professionals such as the school social worker or the school psychologist. They can best evaluate what you are going through.
I wish you all the best.
Both paranoia and schizophrenia are medical diagnoses. You need to speak to someone. Start with the school nurse.
Take advantage of free counseling - go see the counselor at school. ASAP. You deserve a happy life.
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